you ashole.. cant you see she is crying?

you fucker
didnt you know
i can already see the twists

i can always see the twists

she is crying
you are kissing her
she is crying
she is up against the wall and she is screaming
you are kissing you
why cant you hear her scream
why cant you see she is crying

you are kissing her.

stop reminding me that failed

hello
this is my names
this is my face
i reject you
nice to meat you

i told you
i told you
i FUCKING told you
i told me
nothing would come of it
nothing would fucking come of it

stop your fuckign dreaming
if you want to end up happy
stop building fuckign castles

stop fuckign dreaming

I FUCKING TOLD YOU

stop you goddamned crying

your suposed to be strong you purile brat

you cannot be strong and the victim at the same time

broken is not beautiful



they only want to fuck you .

so do it and move on already,
and for god sakes quit you fucking crying.

silly little sad girl

its seven am ... is she really doing this all over again , her blank stare at the wall begs yes while the tears streaking her skin prove its true... sept this time its not a boy .. this time its her life.

her mind is spinning in a deleriouse babble, ranting about how she never got to fit in how she never had a best friend , how her life was full of just being that girl, the new one , the odd one , the tag along to the already long formed group...

she doesnt try to fix it , years of childhood can not be fixed when you were never legitimatly wronged. shes 20, shes a big girl now. a big girl who doesnt have a license or a job that will give her enough hours. a stupid little girl who cries to herself all the time and chastizes herself, im a goddamned big girl. act like it.

she sits up, she wipes her face and finds something worth being seen in . she leaves, out the front door out to find people. she walks a good fourty minutes to the nearest store. kicking herself half the way for being a 20 yr old who cant drive and being secretly releived that all this walking has kept her a reasonable size.
in the store. her face is streaked she looks tired and wronged. out the sto-

she looks up and there he is,who is? he is. barely recognizable but deffinitly him. the sweetheart from highschool, the one guy who she never pursued but kept a flame for. and he looks so different.

so .. new. so perfect for starting over.








i wish i could write my life.